Thursday, July 19, 2018

State Farm App for Safe Driving Discount

Got an offer from State Farm agent.

Bill this program is really offensive, and very KGB. You are going to track my driving for $10 off insurance? Tell your Commie overlords at State Farm, Go Fuck Yourself, you  Orwellian nightmares.  


My Nissan Rogue has a WiFi sign coming out from the front of the hood of a tiny car icon  on the screen. I wrote to their legal department. They said they would share my data with government "as they saw fit." They would not even need a court order. Needless to say, I am never getting another Nissan again. The owner of the dealership said, what are you talking about. I said, sit in the driver's seat, turn on the car. A long legal disclosure statement comes on the screen. He said, I never saw that, it is a little Big Brother. 


Say, I went over the speed limit ten times on a 5 mile trip. I can get 10 speeding tickets from Pennsylvania State Police on a 10 minute trip to the store. Maybe they can have automatic withdrawal from my bank  account, since there is a 100% chance my crimes have been proven. 

So if I stop at a strip club, State Farm will report me to my wife, and send me Google ads for liquor and for casinos? 


Bill, please, forward this reply to the President of State Farm. This State Farm program proposes to
self report a crime a minute. The GPS, motion sensors and gyroscopes in the smartphone will be 
able to report every instance of crossing the median line. The State Police may then roll out the data
in Traffic Court. Every instance of exceeding the speed limit by 1 mph will be recorded in perfect detail. 
Downloading this State Farm app is a waiver of Fourth and  Fifth Amendment rights.


Tell them, do not worry. Just wait a couple of years. Once driverless cars are on the road, they will 

never violate a single rule of the road. Your one hour nightmare commute will turn into a
4 hour nightmare commute as they maintain proper distance between cars. All crashes will end,
 and you insurance people will never have to pay out a single dime. Just collect our premiums,
 and keep them for yourselves. 


David Behar




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